Thirties
Meanwhile, Human
The Hidden Now
#0k
While We Wait For Sunrise
Poetry
Substack
Lifelog
ContacT
Project → Thirties
I never thought I'd see 30, and I'm still not entirely convinced I'll see 40. But while I'm here, I want to find out what happens if I stop letting my days bleed into each other and start working toward the life I've always had in my head. So from my 30th birthday on October 27 2025 to my 40th birthday on October 27 2035, I'm taking one Polaroid every single day, building a physical record of whatever this decade turns out to be.Most of my life has been spent inside - inside my room, my apartment, myself. Film costs money, and having to find something worth shooting every single day makes the astounding smallness of that life harder to ignore. My agoraphobia usually wins, but I'm hoping the weight of the project slowly tips the scales, and that the obligation to show up for it will, over time, push me further out into the world. Into life itself.
I'm also a perfectionist, so Polaroid is a bit of a strange choice. You only get one shot, no editing, and a chemical process that is frustratingly hard to control. Whatever comes out is what you get, and if all you have to remember a beautiful day by is a blurry mess, that's what you keep. I chose Polaroid because the print was physically there, in the room, in the light, in the moment it captured. It will also fade and disappear, like memories do, and like the people and places that helped create them. As tends to be the case, I'm just trying to hold on to what I can, while I can.